


without you

by fadeadfeelings (sadbutgay)



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Established Relationship, F/F, Fluff, Light Angst, Nat is on a mission and wanda is alone, Sharing a Bed, and everything is fine, and lonely, and she cant sleep, minor description of death and violence, so she calls her
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-15
Updated: 2020-03-15
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:22:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23154754
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sadbutgay/pseuds/fadeadfeelings
Summary: Wanda is trying. She really is. But her eyes won‘t stay closed and ther thoughts won‘t stop drifting. For the second night in the row.
Relationships: Wanda Maximoff & Natasha Romanov, Wanda Maximoff/Natasha Romanov
Comments: 6
Kudos: 127





	without you

Tired and restless Wanda turns around for the thousands of times that night. At least that's what it feels like for her. She simply isn't able to fall asleep by herself anymore and that makes her more than just angry.

Sighing dramatically, she gives up trying. The witch aggressively pulls the sheets off her legs and sits up, gazing through the dim room.

The clock on her nightstand reads 3 am. Wanda was awake since... Yes, it must be around 35 hours already, she thinks.

And that's pretty much since Natasha went to the mission Steve sent her to. It was somewhere in Germany again and Wanda really didn't want to ask her girlfriend about it since it seems like a tough topic for her still.

Wanda was attached to Nat since the first time they met - okay, maybe not the first time but definitely the second. Because their first meeting wasn't really something that either of them likes to remember.

But since then, the redhead was there for her when Wanda was grieving about her brother Pietro, and pretty much all the time since then. Since she knows how it is like to be alone. At least when you think you are.

Natasha wanted to show her that she wasn't alone ever and that she wasn't a bad person simply for what she did. That all that wasn't really her fault and that she would never do it again. Even if someone gave her the chance to do so.

And now they are officially girlfriends. Though, it doesn't make the missing and the sleeping problem of Wanda's any easier. In fact, it only made it worse.

When Pietro was gone and they let Wanda stay at the compound, she was in her assigned room and slept for multiple days in a row. She still isn't sure if that's due to her grieving about Pietro or if it was because her powers were overused and she was unbelievably tired and exhausted to no end.

But that was when she was still able to sleep. Then everything turned kind of normal again even when she felt empty as never without her twin at her side. Sleep wasn't a thing that came easy but it came at least.

Not like it does now, or more, it doesn't. Because since she shares her bed with the Russian ex-assassin she has to feel someone laying next to her, or she simply wouldn't be able to fall asleep.

And believe me, she tried, she really tried to continue her routines without Natasha at her side. And it worked mostly. She went to her part-time job at the animal shelter ( it took them a whole while to accept that Wanda wasn't a threat to anyone), made lunch and dinner and even went to visit Bucky and Steve sometimes.

But sleeping solely doesn't work the way she wants it. The whole last night was evidence enough for that. She tossed and turned without finding a single moment of sleep or rest.

Rubbing her eyes, Wanda blindly reaches for the hoodie that lays somewhere in bed with her and pulls it over her shirt.

It was Natasha's, of course. It always smells like her and it will have to do, for now. She couldn't find anything better at the moment. Of course, she would prefer having Natasha to hold her, but you can't have everything, can you?

She tugs the sleeves all the way over her hands, gets up from their bed and pats her way into the dark and empty living room. Ever since Ultron, she also couldn't bear to be in a room without at least one light. So Natasha had to make sure to always leave at least one light on for Wanda.

So she switches on the small light next to their couch and sits down, starting to stare into empty space. The sleep deprivation really drives her to do things she would probably never be doing. Like now she is sitting on the couch at just after 3 am. But who is she kidding? It's not like she hasn't done that before.

Sighing, she picks up her phone and checks if she missed a message, but nothing. Small tears slowly make their way down her cheeks and she has to wipe them away before then drop onto her phone screen.

Wanda considers if calling Natasha would be a good idea. It probably would not. Maybe she was still busy, or asleep... and that would be kind of worse since Wanda doesn't want to wake her. If she was still in a fight she wouldn't bother to check her phone.

What time is it even on the other side of the world? Maybe it's still day? But maybe Natasha is somewhere completely else and just said Germany so she wouldn't concern her girlfriend too much.

But after all that thinking and craving to hear the familiar voice, she really can't help herself and hits the call button.

She lifts her phone to her ear and after a few long beeps, she is met with her girlfriend's voice. Relief floods her body and she feels overwhelmed with safety and peace.

"Wanda? Are you okay?"

Nat sounds concerned on the other end of the line and Wanda tries to hold her tears at bay.

"Yeah, I'm okay," She sniffles.

"Are you sure? Are you crying?"

She smiles lightly at that and wipes the tears from her cheeks that spilled just mere seconds prior.

"Yes. I promise, I just- miss you."

And with that Wanda can already feel a new set of tears forming in her eyes. She is so much more sensitive than she'd normally be.

"Aw baby, I miss you too. Look, we're already on the way back. I'll be there when you wake up."

Wanda just hums, too much of a coward to tell her girlfriend that she simply isn't able to sleep without her by her side.

"Wanda?"

"Hm?"

"But... you do sleep, right?" Natasha asks in a soothing but concerned voice.

"And please don't lie to me."

The Witch's lower lip begins to tremble and suddenly, she can't hold the tears of exhaustion back any longer.

"No," she chokes out. She hates being alone. But this call seems to make the loneliness worse.

"Baby..."

It sounds like Natasha is in pain now too. But the younger woman is sobbing now uncontrollably.

She is clearly struggling to get air into her lungs and to not drive herself into a panic attack.

"Hey Wanda, calm down okay? Shhh..."

She is trying. She really is. But nothing seems to work.

After a few deep breaths, and reassuring words by Natasha. Wanda is able to calm down just enough to breathe properly again.

Suddenly Wanda starts to feel even more tired. She can feel her eyelids start to get heavy, but she isn't quite ready to close them just yet.

"Just like that baby. How about you lay down for a bit and I'll stay on the phone so you know I'm here, hm? I'll be home in a few hours."

Wanda nodded in her sleepy state but soon realized that Nat couldn't see her.

"Yes please."

So she laid down and listens to her girlfriend's voice until the world around her slowly fades into dull sounds and darkness.

&

That's exactly how Natasha finds her in the morning. The young girl is laying on Natasha's side of the bed, in her hoodie and with her phone next to her head.

Natasha steps out of her suit and slowly crawls up into their bed. Laying down next to her girlfriend, she hears Wanda stirring and moving.

The girl slowly turns around and lays her head down onto Natasha's chest and her arms around her body, like it was the most normal thing for both of them.

The redhead smiles and lightly runs her fingers over her lover's back, slowly drawing both Avengers into a peaceful sleep.


End file.
